Books : The Happiest Toddler on the Block: The New Way to Stop the Daily Battle of Wills and Raise a Secure and Well-Behaved One- to Four-Year-Old
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Type of bind: Hardcover
Dewey Decimal Number: 649.122
EAN num: 9780553802566
ISBN number: 0553802569
Label: Bantam
Manufacturer: Bantam
Quantity: 1
Page Count: 336
Printing Date: March 02, 2004
Publishing house: Bantam
Release Date: March 02, 2004
Sale Popularity Level: 41385
Studio: Bantam
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Product Description:
Toddlers can drive you bonkers…so adorable and fun one minute…so stubborn and demanding the next! Yet, as unbelievable as it sounds, there is a way to turn the daily stream of “nos” and “don’ts” into “yeses” and hugs…if you know how to speak your toddler’s language. In one of the most useful advances in parenting techniques of the past twenty-five years, Dr. Karp reveals that toddlers, with their immature brains and stormy outbursts, should be thought of not as pint-size people but as pintsize…cavemen.
Having noticed that the usual techniques often failed to calm crying toddlers, Dr. Karp discovered that the key to effective communication was to speak to them in their own primitive language. When he did, suddenly he was able to soothe their outbursts almost every time! This amazing sucess led him to the realization that children between the ages of one and four go through four stages of “evolutionary” growth, each linked to the development of the brain, and each echoing a step in prehistoric humankind’s journey to civilization:
• The “Charming Chimp-Child” (12 to 18 months): Wobbles around on two legs, grabs everything in reach, plays a nonstop game of “monkey see monkey do.”
• The “Knee-High Neanderthal” (18 to 24 months): Strong-willed, fun-loving, messy, with a vocabulary of about thirty words, the favorites being “no” and “mine.”
• The “Clever Caveman” (24 to 36 months):
Just beginning to learn how to share, make friends, take turns, and use the potty.
• The “Versatile Villager” (36 to 48 months): Loves to tell stories, sing songs and dance, while trying hard to behave.
To speak to these children, Dr. Karp has developed two extraordinarily effective techniques:
1) The “fast food” rule—restating what your child has said to make sure you got it right;
2) The four-step rule—using gesture, repetition, simplicity, and tone to help your
irate Stone-Ager be happy again.
Once you’ve mastered “toddler-ese,” you will be ready to apply behavioral techniques specific to each stage of your child’s development, such as teaching patience and calm, doing time-outs (and time-ins), praise through “gossiping,” and many other strategies. Then all the major challenges of the toddler years—including separation anxiety, sibling rivalry, toilet training, night fears, sleep problems, picky eating, biting and hitting, medicine taking — can be handled in a way that will make your toddler feel understood. The result: fewer tantrums, less yelling, and, best of all, more happy, loving time for you and your child.
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Rated by buyers
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Here is my toddler's reaction to the Fast-Food Rule- "I don't want you to act like me!!! I want you to give me/do what I want!!! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! or I'll throw up!".
I am not here to critique Dr. Karp's book, because after his Happiest baby's 5S calmed my baby miraculously in less than a second, I REALLY wanted him to help me handling my toddlers tantrums, but unfortunately it didn't work. I think there is something wrong in his theory about toddlers. Though I agree that toddlers are really LIKE cavemen and monkeys (mine play only with sticks and stones and DOES look like monkey more often than not) doesn't really mean that they EXPECT us to behave the same. I DID try so many times to mimic my toddler's emotions (I even watched the DVD to be sure I do it all right), but my son not only would NOT calm down, but he would cry even more to the point he'd throw up. It didn't take too long to realize this Rule is not for us. My toddler may be a caveman, but he looks at me as a mature and strong person who will always protect him, warn him about dangers, but most importantly, HELP him deal with emotions not mimic them...I AM fun, when it comes to play, I may act as a caveman, but when it comes to routines (like difficulty falling asleep, leaving the playground) or dangers, I am the one to HELP him and PROTECT him and he expects me to be his SUPER mom, not a caveman!!! So, with time I came with my own rules that work so great that I hardly remember the last time my son had a tantrum and...my rules involve lots of EXPLANATIONS and PROMISES and DISTRACTION, but mostly HUGGING and LOVING, many of those are proved by Dr. Karp to be ineffective.
I admire Dr. Karp and his great discovery about babies longing for the uterus, but that doesn't mean that all babies become the same toddlers and I am sure that back in stone age there have been some difference between cave toddler and cave mother, but Dr. Karp says that when it comes to handling emotions both behave the save. Besides, every toddler has an unique personality. My advise is ... don't waste your time with this book, it won't help you and may confuse you even more. Instead, get to know your toddler and find your unique approach to his/ her unique personality. Another book that I found to be very helpful in my case is "Raising your Spirited Child" - the authors gives different approaches to different spirited children and proved to be effective dealing with tantrums and night waking.
Rated by buyers
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Book does not get to the point. Book goes on and on about useless stuff.
Rated by buyers
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Save your money! What a bunch of bunk!! On top of this the author advises to lock the child in the bedroom if there are issues when putting them to bed, major issue if a fire happens, not to mention abusive to the child!
Also I do not like the fact that the author refers to children as "chimps", offensive!
Rated by buyers
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Although there were some good ideas in this book, I found comparing a child to a 'neanderthal'and all the prehistoric parenting talk (as if we are training chimps) a bit disconcerting. I also didn't care for suggestions to use 'magic words, magic or invisible protective suits, magic water, secret super spray, talismans, etc"., as a means of calming bedtime fears. The author tells us to 'growl' at our prehistoric toddlers to show them we mean business. He even suggests learning to growl convincingly by practicing in the mirror. Neither we or our children are animals. We are people, made in the image of God. We don't need pagan rituals (offering cookies to the smoke detector alluded to in the book), magic of any type, or animal training techniques to raise our children. I find much of this book ludicrous to say the least.
Rated by buyers
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This book is the strangest book on childcare I've ever read. Monkeys and cavemen, I wonder how Nanny 911 would handle Dr. Karp and his children in his home. I guess it's how one believes if we came from Adam and Eve or monkeys. I'm having problems with his approach, if the ideas presented in his book create the kind of relationship I would desire to have with my children.
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